My Single Change That Worked: The Way I Overcame Post-Work Stress Through an Unexpected Find in the Loft

One frequently become like a coiled spring once the workday ends. My shoulders grow tense, breathing becomes rapid and shallow. Typically, closing my laptop with a thud used to lead to the squeak of a cork pulled from a bottle of red, wine poured quickly into a glass, that first mouthful putting a much-needed full stop on the working day.

Then, a few months ago, I came across my now-adult son’s old school recorder up in the loft. I idly blew into it, immediately transported back to the days it was the bane of my life – his daily rehearsals felt like an attack on my ears, the sharp sounds echoing in my mind hours after he had gone to bed.

Instead of throwing it away, I took it down, together with a beginner’s songbook. Growing up, I was the least musical child ever. I’d had recorder lessons at infant school, yet never got to try other instruments.

Googling “how to play the recorder”, I viewed many kid-friendly YouTube clips, and printed out a fingering chart. I searched “easiest recorder tunes”, I felt excited when I played a recognizable Twinkle Twinkle Little Star. Yes, it was something your average five-year-old could master before first break, but as a tone deaf, impatient and stressed 51-year-old, it seemed like a major triumph.

My son asked what the hell I was doing (and begged me to quit), but I kept going – I enjoyed the sensation the recorder gave me. Forgetting notes easily forced me to focus on the music sheet, and painstakingly copy the finger positions. My breath calmed, my attention sharpened, and after nailing that initial shaky melody, I was overjoyed. I had managed to play music.

Today, several months later, I can “play” other nursery rhymes and a passable Ode to Joy. Yes, my rhythm is off, and I must jot down note names, but to me, it’s not about being skilled or a “musician” – it’s purely about the joy it provides and how it clears my mind while playing.

I read that only one in six children learn to play the recorder now, which probably relieves parents, but it made me a little sad and nostalgic for my own school days, as well as my son’s.

I make it a habit to play each night after work before I do anything else, and during those 20 minutes, I am in my own little world. And afterwards, I feel refreshed and happy.

My friends find it amusing, but one very wise therapist friend told me that I was reducing stress, and boosting mental skills, such as memory and auditory processing, which is precious at my age. And in terms of my day-to-day wellbeing, it’s a real “ode to joy” indeed.